The mood certainly is DOWN since Billy’s cremation. I guess up until then it was too hectic getting everything arranged in time and now it feels like the air is out of the balloon, completely. Most people are still wearing mourning outfits, whatever that means to each one, and nobody seems to feel very chatty or happy or in party mode, certainly not. That should not mean, alcohol consumption is down in any way, and God knows what else.

In fact, in the afternoon I came back from a walk in the park, thinking a bit of fresh greenery and blue sky air might lift my own blues. I came in just after four o’clock, and the lobby was empty, usually that is where Vincent is hanging around at that time having a coffee, often together with Laila and the little one and some of the cats are usually there, sleeping and only waking up to get pet or play with someone sitting there, chatting, reading or writing something or whatever they do.

But when I came in it was all quiet and dark, because someone had pulled the velvet curtains closed and then almost no light comes in no matter how bright it may be outside. I thought nobody was there until I saw ChoCho of all people, who wasn’t sitting on one of the sofas (that’s why I didn’t see him right away), instead he was lying on the floor on the small Persian carpet Vincent has there, and he was stone out drunk. MiuMiu, always up for a belly-rub (- she had popped up a few days after Viola had left; as expected Viola had left her in the hotel when she disappeared, maybe she thought we could take better care of the cat -) was lying on her back next to ChoCho, in a strange way mimicking the pose, obviously under the impression it was a great game ChoCho had initiated to entertain her. ChoCho at this point was merely moaning.

Oh man, I have actually never seen ChoCho drunk, surely not to that level, or in any way out of control like that, not even after Orlando. I guess, things are getting a bit too intense right now, even for ChoCho. I opened the curtains to get a bit of light in and motivate him to leave that spot, with a lot of urging and pushing and pulling I could eventually get him up and going to his room, although I think he collapsed in his bed there, but at least better than right in the lobby on the floor.

Josiane Keller “ChoCho drunk on the carpet” (2016)

Josiane Keller “ChoCho drunk on the carpet 2” (2016)

Josiane Keller “ChoCho drunk on the carpet 3” (2016)

ChoCho is one of the people here the others look up to and come for advice (inclusive money, often enough, because he is one of the few people who earns well and regularly performing in the Night Cafe and sometimes also out of town). Somehow I felt it would not help general moral if everyone witnesses the emotional collapse of ChoCho, next to Vincent he holds a too important “parent position” in this group. Damn. Oh well.